Bothered Saturday

I wanted to blog on last night
but my brother started the download
and caused me in so much miserable loading even a page!

=.=

So.. i decided to head to bed and then TRY to sleep
Well
I was in a really great mood yesterday
but let me emphasize
great mood BEFORE the movie
*sighs

I woke up 6am in the morning yesterday
but slept 2am on Friday night
as my cousin is having open house
*his wedding*
Came home at 12am and I headed to bed immediately
but I cant sleep at all!!

and then I headed to Ampang by LRT early in the morning at 645am
the sky was still so dark and
for the FIRST TIME i'm feeling so terrible
As if it's so dangerous.
How would I have such feeling?
Malaysia is just NOT SAFE AT ALL
Walking alone in the street in Melbourne City is not scary at all!

Shooting started when we reach the location and it only stopped for lunch
It was a busy shooting and shooting ended 630pm.
At first i thought i'll be home late cause it is the time where traffic is the worst
but luckily many thanks to Jeff
he dropped me at the Putra LRT station
so that I dont have to get transit from Star Line and then Putra Line
Yay~!

As I finished work
I quickly called my dear Lily
cause we have a date to movie that i've longed!
Step Up 3D!!
But sadly, I was so upset at first
cause no more nice seats left =(

But i'm craving for Step Up 3D!!
So regardless anything
I bought the tickets in 1U
which at first we planned to watch it at Midvalley
And I even offer a ride to my friends at Salak South
Cause I really wanted to watch that movie so so much!

When I reached 1U the traffic in the parking lot is awfully BAD!
But luckily we still manage to find a parking which is quite near to the entrance
:D

And then i was so so so excited
BUT as i sit on the seats
OMG! the seat is BROKEN and also Lok's which is next to me
WTH?!! I paid for the movie and you are giving such service?!!
But as the movie started I totally forgot about the chair
as I got so excited~ Woah!

But somehow
I felt that he is bored
=\
sighs*
What ever.

I dont know what he thinks
I dont know what he wants
Sometimes
I just use to think
maybe I'm just too............. well
I dont know what's the right word to even describe myself
Ya maybe I'm annoying or irritating
But maybe you dont even care anything about me
I dont know what happen after the movie
Maybe I'm just thinking too much
Or maybe you are just tired.

:: I'm not sure :: At all
You werent talking to me
Even I am asking you question
You were answering after 10seconds
And I greeted you goodnite and bye
but no response in return

Or even a sms asking whether am I home?
Until I spammed ur mobile
After sending them home
I took a slow drive with my dear
but after sending my dear home
I speed all the way at LDP
I felt lonesome
What's on my mind at that moment was

"Why not I just die in a car accident?!"
All the way to Sunway and then took a U-Turn back to Kelana Jaya
sighs*

Until now
I had this very mixed feeling
I dont wanna eat anything at all
Not hungry at all
Moodless
brother went to work
and Family is out for lunch
but i stayed home

I thought of suiciding
but that's silly
And yet there are so many thing in this world
for me yet to embark :: explore :: experience

And lucky that I'm staying with my family
But I'd rather live like a corpse
I feel like going against so many things
I can just shed a tear out of sudden
I dunno why but maybe depression

I guess I might need a doctor
or maybe Caffeine to make myself numb
Alcohol to forget
or Drugs to hypnotize

I dont know who I am anymore
It seems like I've lost myself
sighs*

Maybe I should just go to HELL